Empty, unsure of how to feel as closing the laptop was my only option, stunned almost shaking. I didn’t know how to reply, as there’s still another chance I could prove to her worthy. Being so obsessed to prove what? Thinking to myself “why do I need to prove anything at all?? all I wanted was my weight-loss story told, rightfully deserved in many opinions. For them it seemed as if someone was doing everything they can to not publish it” So it seemed. Inside fitness magazine had no problem sharing my story twice. Honored to be apart, of a story and inspiring hurdles, the goal wasn’t to inspire bodybuilders, it was to try and inspire a woman by the name Tosca! “Tosca Who?” you ask, and every week I would tell everybody who she was, including the local paper. Someone called the Peterborough Examiner, about my remarkable story. A lady showed up, with a notebook, video camera and a eagerness to tell a story at Golds Gym. I mailed her a copy of same newspaper clipping which later she disclosed she got it. With no reply!
It was as if this woman ignored every attempt, why? Why wouldn’t you want to showcase somebody, like myself who has been loyal, dedicated, compassionate about the brand. At the time I didn’t understand business or politics, which usually are attached to money. Againm, the whole story she gave me on the phone about being the wrong bathingsuit for the constest, was the most bizarre story as I said “I have pictures to prove it.
That’s why sometimes winning the lottery can wreck so many lives. Believing it may probably cause more problems than good. Coming to learn, custom cannabis honey again has flipped my life around, a problem which has me on guard.Not sure if going into shock, or maybe my expectations are too high of the contest. But then again she’s the one that call my house? I had moved on, leaving her and the kaos all of this caused online in the past. Regardless, knowing submitting my results in the right suit, following the rules of the contest. Resting assured, I wasn’t in the wrong. Something went wrong, not able to fix it. Learning it wasn’t meant to be gave me some strength to carry forward. Deciding to save all my photos, info, documents was just lucky. Knowing someday writing a book, may just come true.
I sent off a couple more emails with no reply‘s, realizing now I was NEVER going to be part of her team as someone else had taken my place within weeks of the contest. The truth wouldn’t come out right away, it was just a matter a time finding out who took my place would not shock me, it would devastate me. It was her. The same girl, in the same groups, same competition. She was her new ambassador . If she has been honest with me all along. It wouldn’t have hurt so bad leaving me high and dry. False hopes and beliefs in something you never was going to offer and I knew it.
Wed 2011-10-26, 2:03 PM
Thank You for This, I am feeling “Not Good Enough” through all my hard work and changing of lives. I want this more than you know from all my struggles and roadblocks. I won’t turn my back that is for sure. I am doing my Best too! I will send you the photos..I will continue to train and work hard and I HOPE . I can be the Ambassador for you in the time you need me too..
Lots of Love.
She never responded to me after that. With one more chance I sent her this in hopes my last attempt to have my story told, of survival and inspiration told.
Tue 2011-10-25, 7:25 AM
I wanted to share this with you as the messages keep pouring in.
22 minutes ago
I saw your You Tube story which I believe I found on the Eat Clean Website. I have to say it was so inspiring. We have similar situations in that my sons father died which has sent me into years of overeating and lots of weekend drinking. I’m so tired of feeling so horrible about myself which got me on the website to begin with. I just bought my first Eat Clean Book and a friend of mine works at a gym and is helping me with a membership. I posted your story on my FB page and it keeps me inspired. Thank you soooooooo much for giving me hope!
I cried, as if no one was watching, listening or even cared. As the tormenting messages in the silly high school drama continued on her kitchen table I decided to completely remove myself 100%. I still followed the clean diet on Facebook faithfully and her daughters were Facebook friends. My personality hand changed and I continue done doing what I normally would’ve done anyway. But what was about to happen I wasn’t ready for. I had just finished my first semester my recreation and leisure diploma, and it was Christmas time, I normally it’s one of the saddest times of the year, due to my past and upbringing and lack of family support, and watching my children grow up without their grandfather or uncle interested in them. These are children, who don’t understand that they are not the responsible ones to try to maintain a friendship or relationship with another member of the family especially if the other member as an adult.
I had just ended my YouTube account, as well as deleted my FB profile where no one could find me. where the video of me sharing my results of my weight loss journey promoting Tosca, and the eat clean diet which was viewed many thousands of times including the infamous picture of angel wing earrings gifting her months prior. Deleting most of the evidence, that this chapter ever existed. Every chance I had, I eat chocolate. No one knew how much Halloween candy I purchased at Walmart just after Halloween, after the October 26 email from her Nice fully ending our connection. Opening my laptop again sending personal emails to close friends and family for updates. Typing with shaking hands I spoke
RE: saying hello
Tue 2012,11,11 9:39 PM
I deleted my main account.. I was being harassed by the followers of Tosca Reno from all the bullshit years ago some Kimberly Captain Morgan .. check her outhttps://youtu.be/GfLijTdfcB8. She harassered the crap out of me, and now She got what I rightfully worked hard for. I can’t take it … I am on there as my mom
to keep in contact with close friends and family
Mitzi Young, RLS
Sitting by the fire , Cleaning out the laptop, I come across a video in the recommendations feed. Announcing the next challenge, clicking the link it was her
My heart started to beat again, feeling sick to my stomach with panic my thoughts were correct. Possibly this individual had something they wanted, It was impossible to give us both an ambassador position. After realizing the “mistake” they made. They covered it all up. In a business perspective if enough time goes by, let it go just in enough time so that it didn’t look deliberate,maybe by then people would have forgotten what had happened during the whole fiasco. There are a few people who haven’t forgotten how someone made me feel. Intentionally maybe NOT? It happened, which interrupts her true colours. Making someone feel so low and hopeless,yet to try and build up someone by calling “MY” house, offering me something so amazing ,to take away giving the offer to another individual. This felt so totally wrong and unfair. As I said to her in the prior email….
I didn’t need an Ambassador position to “complete me,” as I run on a different set of rules. I treat people with respect, honesty and dignity, that I expect the same in return. It would be the lead i would take after spreading my mother’s ashes. A lead of her legacy;to lead by example, in everything I did. Getting recognition, noticed wasnt as easy people think. Everybody has a story to tell, but it’s who’s going to make it the most money will get the attention the most. Not fitting the bill of the mould currently I guess they were looking for at the time. That’s when I said fuck it. I start drinking wine all the time, enjoying anything I wanted to eat at any time. I started to train erratically, plato resulting in a terrible knee injury, resulting in chondromalacia patella.
Starting to train hard, as they became angry, not knowing how to deal with the emotion. Throwing myself into the gym, during self-destruction became an endless war against myself, and my identity of who I was. It was as if I lost myself, allowing another individual or group have that much power on my emotion. Starting to compare myself to others going down the same journey, winning contests under different circumstances caused anger, jealousy and frustration. Sending off another email to friends after a year of nonsense went like this. I started to type and the last viewed post of the whole disappointment.
October 8, 2012.
I have been busy planning my career path and trying to not let others get to me. I will be honest with you all, I have never been the same since the events of 2011 and Tosca Reno. I will never post that on my page. I have felt robed and let down to the extreme from someone I thought was real and honest. I lost much of my Facebook passion frankly hating it but still do it because I have people who love what I post. , after finding out girls at my local gym were always trying to be one up from me, and after finding out the obsessive side of wanting to win(from them) taking steriods and cocaine; I have really lost much desire to compete, train and even think of photoshoots. watching them blab on Facebook about this healthy living …puke!
I feel like my world flipped after 5years of hardcore training (for me ..no contest) and once all that came into play, I lost me, I lost the real Mitzi who doesn’t like competition and drama. Girls have flocked to my page to tear me apart (friends of these girls) because I have the drive to succeed and I have that mentality if I want to use it.
I thought I would send you all an update on what’s going on.
Again, feeling so emotionally drained. Hitting send allowed my honesty to be gone, off my chest and emotional baggage I carried around. Furthering deeper into depression with the ongoing struggles of Social Media scrollers looking for any story they can tear apart, as reaching for the stars was becoming even more traumatizing.
Welcome To My Story
Cannabis Enthusiast : Craft Edible Creator : Recreation and Leisure Professional : Blogger
A Craft Edible Experience